This is not a drill! If you’re thinking of seeing a movie or going for karaoke with your office crush on Friday, abort mission and read this first.
Valentine’s Day is on Friday. Everyone is looking extra nice this week and smiling. Nails done, outfits on point. Some people are mysteriously falling sick and taking some off days..
Someone has worn red too early. Someone is suddenly very helpful. Flowers will start arriving by Thursday. HR will pretend not to notice. And you, a focused and responsible 9–5 professional, are now unreasonably aware of one particular human being in the building.
Your office crush.
Before you do anything dramatic this week, let us offer gentle but urgent advice:
Ghost them!
(cue Show Dem Camp’s No love in Lagos)
Why Ghost Your Office Crush This Week?
Here’s the business case for ghosting them this week. Can you see my screen? Great.
1. We Are Still Recovering from January. Funds Are on Low Power Mode.
Let’s start with the economy.
I don’t know about you but January was long. The bills came with a vengeance this time. Data subscriptions increased without apology. And your bank app is still recovering emotionally.
Now is not the week to add:
- Thoughtful Valentine’s gifts
- Surprise lunch plans
- “Let’s sit out after work” expenses
Romance is lovely but if you took our Financial Literacy Course, you will know that financial stability is lovelier.
2. Office Love 101: You Do Not Shoot Your Shot on Valentine’s Day
Except you’re a JJC, you should know that you cannot “declare” your intentions on Valentine’s Day.
That’s too much pressure. Your deliverables cannot even make your chest that tight. Besides, you know that if they don’t accept your “proposal” your Q1 and even Q2 will suffer.
If you confess feelings on a random Tuesday in March, it’s a conversation. If you confess on Valentine’s Day, it becomes an event.
Office love requires tact and patience. So, wait.
3. This Is the Week to Confirm Whether They Are Actually Single
Valentine’s week reveals truths.
Here’s how you can do your due diligence:
- Make sure you can see their Whatsapp status. Monitor it more than your KPIs (after work hours o)
- Check if they just got a haircut or hairdo. Are the nails done too? New shoes or perfume?
- Observe any mysterious breakdowns. Are they suddenly down and need to take leave from Thursday to Friday?
- Watch and see if they’re excusing themselves to answer calls in the corridor or if they’re smiling at their phone too much. KPIs have been set. There’s nothing to smile about now.
Data before drama. Assumption is expensive. Investigation is free.
Can you still see my screen? Okay. I’ll be faster.
4. You’re Not Even Sure You Like Them Yet
Have a one-on-one with yourself. Do you actually like them?
Or do you just like their aura, style, ideas or work efficiency or maybe how they say your name during meetings:
It could also be that they make work not so boring and tiring. Think about it well. When your week feels repetitive, anything slightly exciting feels like destiny.
Pause before you turn convenience into commitment.
But on the other hand, it is now VERY convenient to “sharply” apply for jobs on Jobberman. Less than 2 mins and you’re done. Try this one first.
Moving on…
5. Everyone is Watching and Screenshots Travel Fast During Peak Seasons
Nothing is ever truly “low-key” in a workplace. Your chats on teams or Slack are not private. This is peak season and people are looking for hot gossip. If you shoot your shot now even on Whatsapp, your office crush and their office bestie will exchange screenshots. Next week, your feelings may become public and everyone will start noticing how you always hug your crush differently.
Professional perception is long-term. If the relationship does not make it to the next stage, your walks around the office will be the walk of shame for a while. Protect your name.
I’m almost done with my presentation. Just two more points.
Besides, if you’re new to this whole corporate thing or you’ve decided that this year, you won’t cower for anybody, build your confidence with our Soft Skills Course. 2 hours only and you’re done. Good way to refocus, yes or no?
6. Don’t Play With Your Emotional Health. Think About Your KPIs.
Performance reviews do not care about your love life. Your company did not employ you to find love in the office.
Valentine’s week is still a work week. If anything, it is the week to double down on visibility, output and professionalism.
Let your excellence be louder than your crush.
7. Sometimes the Crush Is Just a Symptom
Here’s the real plot twist. Sometimes you don’t actually like them.
You’re just unchallenged, slightly bored, possibly feeling stuck and looking for a win or craving something new.
Before you romanticise a colleague, ask yourself: Is it them… or is it that you need change?
If it’s the latter, look for courses to take on Jobberman
What to Do Instead This Week
Redirect the energy.
- Update your CV.
- Complete or refresh your Jobberman profile.
- Apply for at least one opportunity that stretches you.
- Sign up for a soft skills training that strengthens your confidence and communication.
- Volunteer for a project that gives you visibility.
Again, it is now easier to apply for jobs on Jobberman. Exploring new opportunities no longer feels like a second full-time job. If what you are truly craving is excitement, growth or a better work environment, you can act on that.
And if your office crush is meant to be? It will survive one week of professional discipline.
But what do I know? I could be wrong. This is the end of my presentation. Any questions, comments or suggestions?
