David Cross is a self-described “professional talker,” but let’s go ahead and expand on that bio just a bit. Cross is one of the funniest human beings on this planet we call Earth, touting a resume that is absolutely littered with iconic comedy creations — Mr. Show, Arrested Development and his latest special, Worst Daddy in the World, to name a few.
He’s very funny — and very busy. He currently hosts the podcast Senses Working Overtime with David Cross and put together a show, David Cross and His Super Pals, which will feature the likes of Bob Odenkirk, Sarah Silverman and Fred Armisen New York City’s SummerStage in Central Park on August 8. Also on August 8, he’ll star in the fourth and final season of The Umbrella Academy, and after that? He’s hitting the road with his new comedy tour, David Cross: The End of the Beginning of the End.
Yes, he is very busy. But happily, not too busy that he couldn’t find time to sit down for a chat for an upcoming episode of the How Success Happens podcast. I was the other person involved in that chat, so I can tell you that Cross was both hilarious and insightful as he detailed his path from comedy club newbie to one of the top comedians working today.
Here are some sneak peeks at our conversation, which have been edited for length and clarity. Enjoy!
On creating new material for specials
“Like most comics, once you do a special and your stuff’s out there, unfortunately, that stuff is done,” Cross says. “Standup is the only place where this exists in the arts. That material is done. You burn it. You’ve got to start fresh every single time. When I start out, I don’t have a particular theme in mind. I riff a lot, and then bits will expand, and I write on stage. So, the stuff I’m doing at the end of the tour is different than the beginning. When it comes time to make a special, I always need to cut some stuff I’ve developed because I don’t want to be up there for two hours. I’ll always have about 20 minutes of stuff that I haven’t done yet that I can carry into the new show, so I’m not starting completely from scratch.”
On insulting parts of the country he performs in
“When was the last time you went to Phoenix?” Cross asks. “Because I was there recently and had really fun shows, but those people aren’t under the impression that they’re living in a place that doesn’t suck. We know this place sucks. I have to be here for school. I have to be here for work. Look, a third of our country lives in areas where they are required — by city ordinance — to put out cooling water misters. Otherwise, half of the citizenry will die. Believe me, people who live in these places know it sucks.”
Related: Taylor Swift Revealed the Surprising Way She Prepares Her Mind and Body for Big Moments
On assembling his Super Pals
“Super Pals is going to be an amazing show,” Cross says. “We have an amazing lineup, but I will say this now: I guarantee one or two of these folks will flake. It always happens. Always. I shouldn’t say that, but there’s always something that comes up. It happened when I did two nights at Irving Plaza in New York. I said, ‘There are going to be special guests because I’m home and all my friends are here.’ And then two of them called — for valid reasons — and were like, ‘Oh yeah, I can’t do the show.’ So you just have to deal with it. It was too bad it wasn’t a benefit because then I could guilt them.”
On being a secret star in his own home
“My daughter Marlow just saw a clip of Chipmunks and said, ‘Hey, that’s daddy.’ And then that was about all the interest she showed — which I’m thrilled about,” Cross says. “Honestly. She’s heard my voice in movies and shows but never made the connection. She’s probably watched Megamind five times, and she’s watched Kung Fu Panda a bunch. I did Bubble Guppies and some other kid things because she liked them, but she never made the connection. Maybe when she’s older, she will. I’m not going to sit her down and turn on these shows and go, ‘Hey kiddo, it’s about time I showed you what daddy does.'”
On resurrecting Arrested Development
“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” says Cross. “I just don’t. And Jessica [Walter]’s not with us anymore, so I don’t know how you do it without Lucille. And, I mean, ideally, we would have stopped after season four. Look, I loved it, and I still love it, and I’m so lucky to have been given that opportunity, and I love those guys, but I don’t think we should do it anymore.”
Related: Jon Stewart Says Apple Wouldn’t Let Him Talk About AI – Entrepreneur
On staying motivated
“Sometimes it’s tough,” Cross says. “I’m tired; we were out last night till two in the morning, and then we had to get up and go to the Spokane airport and make a connecting flight to Oklahoma City, and you don’t get in till late, and I’ve just been eating Fritos. But I mean, it’s professionalism. You have to figure out how to get yourself ready to go, whether it’s doing a bunch of pushups or whatever. One thing I pride myself on is that I give 100% every time I’m up there. And even if the crowd sucks, which doesn’t happen that much anymore, I always imagine a 16-year-old kid in the balcony who is at his first comedy show. And he or she wants to do stand-up. I want to do that show for that kid, because I was that kid at one point.”
On taking criticism
“The people whose criticism I always listen to are my wife, Amber, Bob Odenkirk and a handful of people, including Jon Benjamin,” Cross says. “When they give me a compliment, I know it’s not bullshit, and I know it comes from an intellectual place. But some people like my stuff way too much. And some people just hate my stuff. I try not to listen to those extremes. If the criticism is something like ‘You’re offensive’ or ‘You shouldn’t talk about that,’ those things aren’t really criticisms. But if somebody has a critical take on a bit, and I can see their point and where they’re coming from, that’s a criticism I’ll take and acknowledge. Whether I choose to do anything about it is a different story. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t.”
On the end of times
“Aliens are not going to be the cause of an apocalypse,” Cross says. “We’re in a very, very, very, very, very slow yet absolutely real apocalypse. Apocalypse doesn’t necessarily mean a bunch of fireballs descend on planet Earth, and in seven seconds, we’re wiped out. No. We’re going through the apocalypse right now in real-time. My plan? Go out on tour, sell some merch, and then just invest in fresh water.”