I have an eighth-grader, y’all! A whole middle schooler. Somebody hold me! As we countdown to the first day of school, I’ve been trying to figure out what life will look like.
First of all, where did the summer go? I could’ve sworn we were just on the beach, watching the waves roll in as we snacked on chips and drank pineapple slushies. Now, I must figure out clothes, supplies, violin cases, volleyball tryouts, performances and dances. Did I mention I also have a full-time job? I think that’s important here.
Source: Sili Recio
That being said, I love this time of the year. It allows me to think back to a time when my biggest worry was if Mami had left me money for my Blimpies field trip sub while I listened to Z100 before school. As I type this, I have “Lost in Emotion” playing in my head. Judge yo mom!
As we speed walk toward the first last day of middle school, I’m side-eyeing the list of all that has to get done. Is it me, or are kids busier these days than we ever were? This season allows me to flex my project manager muscle because the summer has been all about no routines. With day-to-day parenting on my shoulders, staying organized is paramount.
Which is why ya girl has created commandments for back-to-school season.
Thou shalt have a bedtime routine.
You might not want to hear it, but the first person that needs a bedtime routine is you! Make sure that after your middle schooler is snug up in bed at the designated time, you have a bedtime and a little time to get settled, grounded and prepared for the next day. Extra points if you set the phone down an hour before bedtime to allow your brain the time it needs to throttle down.
Remember the outfits, and keep to the nightly selections.
Last year, I learned that a teen could take up to 25 minutes staring at their closet before figuring out what to wear. And at least once during the week, this exercise would end up with her freaking out because she couldn’t find her new favorite [insert item of clothing here] that she really wanted to wear. By ensuring outfits are selected the night before, I avoid delays and meltdowns in the morning routine that can throw off the entire day. Which brings me to…
Honor your schedule.
With chamber orchestra performances as a priority this year, volleyball tryouts, tutoring, my job, my writing, the pets and the managing of anything and everything that needs handling, a schedule goes a long way to ensuring sanity, minimizing stress and allowing everyone to be on the same page. While there is an electronic family calendar, a handy board is never far from our hands. We place it in a common area where it can be seen often. Not only does it remind us of what needs to get handled, but it also helps the teen develop a routine. It is also teaching her how to juggle tasks and prioritize what has to be done. Win-win!
Thou shalt meal plan.
For the record, I rolled my eyes when I typed that. It ain’t easy, but when it’s done, life is beautiful. With after-school activities taking center stage this year, I will continue not just planning the meals to ensure I have what I need to cook, but I’m also keeping the tradition of ordering out once a week. If it’s in the plan, then it is holy, and let me tell you, there are many days when I breathe a sigh of relief for this option. Like the time that I thought I’d taken the chicken out of the fridge and had planned to cook early only to realize as I ran out to pick up my daughter that the chicken was, in fact, still happily frozen. I’m pretty sure my mom is cackling from heaven’s payback moment from childhood. Don’t act like I was the only one that forgot!
You shall show yourself grace.
This is probably the most important of the back-to-school commandments! Promise me that as you enter the new school year, you will show yourself some grace. Being able to recognize all we have going on and understanding that we will fall short some days is one of the best gifts we can give ourselves. And not just ourselves but our children as well. Modeling this behavior will create better-coping mechanisms as they grow. And when all else fails, I always have that food delivery order from my favorite spot in the middle of my week. I’m not telling you what it is because I wouldn’t say I like it when people find out about my faves, and then I have to wait longer for my delivery.
Above all, don’t forget that the kids will be alright. Tell them you love them and hug them tight as they step into a new school year. And, if you have a daughter that considers herself a fashionista, be sure to raid her room in search of that favorite top you haven’t been able to find for a few weeks. I’m not a snitch or anything, but Sis, she got it!
These back-to-school commandments will surely get you through your middle schooler’s year! Good luck.
